Monday, June 29, 2009

time out...

Sometime I remembered that I'm not a machine and take a rest in my car.

the car is like a sanctuary.

Friday, June 26, 2009

get ready...

need to sleep now... there'll be a long battle tomorrow...

Thursday, June 25, 2009

M.C.



I got MC last Monday... It was because I was sick with laziness. I had never went to the clinic asking for MC if I dont need it but that Monday was the beginning of a new light. I like it hahahah...It was easy...The night before, I called a few friends to ask about the best clinic to ask for MC...they tell me a few of them...I was scared because I have never done it before....

As I waited for my turn, I over heard an old man talking to two kids...The boy is in year one and the girl in kindergarten...The old man adviced them " atok bagi duit ni jangan beli rokok.!!..jangan isap rokok...!!"...hmmmmm isnt it to early to give that advice...I didn't hear the rest of the conversation...The Doc called my name.... I donno wat to say to the doc....

It was a piece of cake...The doctor didn't even looked in to my eyes and that make it easy to lie....

***

fashionably late or not....

I'm in a course right now. I was two hours late and I came in with my Hugo Boss shades intact to my eyes and entered with broad chest and stern face. Nobody dared to say anything. They felt the aura of rage and knew not to mess with me. Great!! my tactic worked one more time...hehehe....

ohh and for anyone who wants to use this tactic, make sure you haven't shaved for two days...I looked very mean with short beard around my face....and include the attitude too....

Sunday, June 21, 2009

when boredom strikes...

I was suppose to be in class today but was too lazy too get up...Yup that's a lame excused but hey its still an excuse...I thought it would be fun doing nothing at home but I was dead wrong....I did nothing until 3.30 and that's it.....I pack a book and my i-pod and went to buy some food. I was tricked by the KFC commercial on tv and went to KFC to get that spicy chicken...

Friday, June 19, 2009

tag....

Thank you Shah - a lifetime saga for the tag....I'll answer the questions in the tag as sincere as I can...

1. What have you been doing recently?

I done nothing but to fatten myself....

2. Do you ever turn your cellphone off?

no...I never turn them off...atleast not at the same time....

3. What happened at 10.am today?

was teaching the year 3 class.... was angry at one boy who walked around when I was explaining something....I took his table and chair and put them outside...I told him "if You don't want to sit at your place then there are no use of this table and chair". He sat on the floor and then he gave me his full attention to win me back. 15 minutes was all he took to win my compassion and got his table and chair back. I never stayed angry for long.

4. When did you last cry?

hmmm maybe when I was in primary school....I tried to cry sometimes but I just can't....I hope I can....

5. Believe in fate/ destiny?

Yes...I believe in god so I believe in fate too....my fate is written by god.

6. What do you want in your life now?

I want my life to be peaceful and according to the way of Islam...

7. Do you carry an umbrella when it rains or just put up your hood?

If I have an umbrella at the time of course I'll use it but if not then anything will do. Ohhh but I dont carry it all the time.

8. What’s your favourite thing to do on the bed?

This must be a trick question...for now its sleeping...when I got married then it would be a different answer....

9. What bottoms are you wearing now?
A levi's pants...not a jean...I rarely wear jeans now...

10. What’s the nicest thing in your inbox?

Inbox of what?..email or my mobile phone?....hmmmmm...if its mobile then its any sms from lady dragonfly....

11. Do you tend to make the relationship complicated?

never but it always happen...

12. Are you wearing anything borrowed from anyone?

Nope...I don't like wearing borrowed stuffs....

13. What was the last movie you caught?

hmmm Star Trek....

14. What are you proud of?

Hmmmm This is the toughest question....I'm proud of my....hmmmm family....I think....

15. What does the oldest text message in your inbox say?

X kuor ke?

16. What was the last song you sang out loud?

a stupid song from the year 3 textbook....

17. Do you have any nicknames?

Yes...

18. What does the newest text say?

tahu dah.

19. What time did you go to bed last night?
2 a.m. I never sleep early....

20. Are you currently happy?
hmmm no....but not miserable too....

21. Who gives you the best advise?

I give me the best advice ever....

22. Do you eat whipped cream straight from the can?

Never in my life...I had never hold a whipped cream can...

23. Who did you talk on the phone last night?

Cikgu Yusri...discussing on our group assignment.

24. Is something bugging you now?

yes...this question is bugging me.....hahah

25. Who was the last person to make you laugh?

A student of mine.....

26. Choose your lucky friends and tag them.

I choose not too.....

Monday, June 15, 2009

not that bad....

Ohhh today was not that bad...The students seem to missed me so much but I don't really shared the same feeling hihi...maybe a little...

Last night I wrote a letter to the Head... I wrote it with caution and grace that it looks like a love letter...even printed it on a pale purple paper...and the envelope looks like a wedding invitation case....

I did not delivered it yet....The headmistress was so nice today that I just don't have the heart to wound her...

below is the introduction of the letter.... what a shame I did not delivered it.
*

Dear Madam Headmistress,

I am writing this letter as a mean of communication for me to convey the thought of mind that have been hunting my sanity for quite some time now. I cannot express what I feel verbally as I respect you so much and for me to ask a favour from you would be something that I am very shy off. I am sorry for not confronting you face to face and tell you directly as you are the nicest woman I ever met and my tongue would be glued in front of you. I tried to talk to you about this but I was muted every time I tried. I feel a burden to tell you in written words but this is something that I just have to do. I will explain to you as clear as I can and I hope you will forgive me if my words are out of place.


boring days are coming.....

oHHh gosh the weeks sure went fast. Tomorrow its school day again. work work work and work. I love teaching don't get me wrong. Yes it was not my ambition to be a teacher but I have the hang of it already. I can't imagine doing other thing than teaching but.... The big but are the other work load... I hate the clerking work....Gosh I better be a clerk if I want to do all that. I hope the new minister of education do something about it.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Lust over the sanity of mind

The first time I lost my control over my lust was when I got the 1st credit card. I went to a PC store and saw a laptop. I already had a pc but the shining grey laptop made my eyes sparkled and my heart beat drums like its going to explode. It was like love at first sight and I cant took it out of my mind. I wondered to other stores but my head keep thinking about the laptop. Shitt I'm bedazzled and the only cure was to get the laptop in my arms and kiss it and runs my fingers on the soft keyboard. I got No cash and usually that's it, I would go home and just Imagined if I had the laptop. That day It was different. I got a card in my back pocket. I hesitated for quite some times and then swope it.

I got what I want. I rode my Lagenda home like I never rode it before. I just cant wait to switch it on at home. Charging the battery for eight hours and watch dvd on it.

The card was like a magic wand. I can get anything I want. That was four years ago.

just to remind myself.

It seem that my skills are not sharpen yet. I have so many things to learn and it looks like I have not progress toward excellent but just the monotonous and lousy self that I am. I bought a lot of books on how to improve my skills but I have not read them just yet. I need to if I want to be trusted with picture of lifetime. I promise myself that I will strive the perfection.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

blood...

It is not easy to control your irritation, cover them in front of public, acting like you don't care when you are irritated.

I do all these thing because I do not want to smear the relationship but in my heart its like a vine of thorns wrap around the heart. The grip of the thorny vine become tighter and tighter for every split second and for a time its going to blow up the heart. Blood rushing out from the punctured holes made by the thorns and sprayed around the canvas of life making it bloody ugly.

minta maaf aku nak mencarut sekejap....xperlu bace yek....

gampang nye A!@#$...lecturer kedua paling aku xsuke...aku dah buat sehabis baik kamu bagi aku C+ je....ape yang kamu nak tah le...dari dulu kelas kamu mesti dapat C+ je....celaka haram jadah..... kalo dapat B pun aku xkesah sangat...woi kamu nak ape hahhhh.?...xkan nak aku kipas kot......subjek yang kamu ajor tu bukan susah pun kenape lak aku xbleh skor...subjek laen yang memamg payoh giler pun aku dapat jauh lebih baik dari subjek kamu ajor....dari sem 1 kamu memang celake...mase sem 1 subjek kamu je aku fail subjek laen ok je...aku amek subjek tu ngan lecturer laen senang je aku skor...camane kamu jadi lecturer ni?....bengangnye aku bile usaha yang tinggi dapat keputusan camni.....

minta maaf semua...nak luahkan perasaan sekejap....

Friday, June 12, 2009

back to the 60's

I'm selling like hot cakes...haha

I'm 26 years old. the age of a ripe young man who should get married. In my heart there is only one person that I'll be longing to be with.

The problem is that she did not agreed to get married yet. My mother had been very busy saying No to her friends who wanted me to wed their daughters. two of my aunts been persuading my mother to wed me with their grand daughters. My sisters have been promoting me to their friends too.

What should I say to them?...

should I wait for Lady dragonfly to say yes to my proposal?...

ohhh gosh I'm puzzled......

All this while I thought only girls face this kind of problem......

the most hideous monster

I been lazying around this holiday. I haven't do anything sensible to life. Ooohhh but is just so me..doing nothing is my specialty...its a talent or hmmm should I say a curse. I let my life to this boring path and babble about them on and on again.

I watched a lot of movies on the laptop. I got them all from a friend. A friend that had just had his day of happiness. He go engaged last week and I photographed the happiest day of his life for now. The happiest day going to be the wedding day but that is a year to wait. I have to say I hate weddings...not hate like hate, more to envy actually. My girlfriend or if she could be called a girlfriend don't want to get married yet or at least maybe not to me just yet. How more pathetic could i get ohhh yes very pathetic indeed. A man like me have been push away once to many. Maybe I should start looking around now. I have not been doing that since I met her. I don't think I'm hideous enough for the girls to run and scream. Ohh if I could compliment myself I would say I'm rather charming. Ohh gosh don't make the face now. where else can I be praised if it's not I myself who praised me. YES its pathetic and I know it.

Pathetic...I used that word too often now...Ohhh gosh maybe That is why I have not been hooked for quite a while now.

Nahhh....I could swept any girl from their stands but that doesn't mean that those girls can make me floating..... since I met her no other girls have achived making me sweats just to pick clothes on a date. Yes that is how I know she's the one but all this while I can't see any signal that tells me I'm the one for her.....

Love.... the most complicated thing on earth....

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

berangan....

If I ever mutated I do not want a change of body parts. I want the power of seducing.
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